Monday, April 23, 2012

Kind of big and kind of beautiful; a middle of the road feminist blog.



Hey guys, I have been thinking a lot (more than usual) about this topic lately and was thinking of doing a blog about it, possibly with another woman/women. I have never done anything like this before so I thought I'd sort of focus-group it here. Please give my your honest feedback!

Kind of big and kind of beautiful; a middle of the road feminist blog.

I am a 28yr old intelligent, accomplished American woman currently working toward my Ph.D. in Neuroscience at a top research university. I’ve been out of middle school for nearly 15 years and am approaching my 10 year high school reunion. Still, some days, my most pressing concern is losing weight. Not really for my health, my BMI is in the normal range. Not to be popular or desired by men, I have wonderful friends and an amazing boyfriend who all love me exactly the way I am. In fact, my boyfriend, friends, and family are often complimentary about my looks. So why do these vain insecurities about my weight and my body linger? Why do I happily acknowledge beauty in other women around me who don’t fit into the “Hollywood ideal” while simultaneously refusing to acknowledge that in myself? Maybe its because I’m shallow. Maybe I’m weak-willed. I’ve struggled with these feelings for more than 20 years (I once discovered a “diet journal” in my girl scout notebook from 3rd grade), and in many ways I’ve overcome the worst of them. Now that I’m an adult I know that my feelings are shared by many, possibly most, women and I think that sucks. I’m tired of these feelings and, if you’re reading this, I bet you are too. But they’re still here, so we may as well acknowledge them and try to figure out why they’re so damn persistent. And, if we’re really good, maybe we can help the next generation of women avoid this colossal waste of time.